YOUR FRIENDS COULD BE YOUR ENEMIES
In my eyes it’s true – the environment we are surrounded by has a bearing on us whether we like it or not.
Our views and beliefs can be heavily influenced by what we constantly see and hear from the people we are closest to.
The law of attraction is the theory that whatever we focus on and think about is what we attract – positive or negative.
It’s why you often see little cliques forming. People feel comfortable being around others that can justify and reinforce their own beliefs and thoughts.
It’s familiar which means it’s safe.
Our accumulation of friends starts at an early age in preschool and through our parents connections with other parents. During our school years we develop more friendships and associations through team sports and social gatherings and then even further once we hit the workforce.
Having close friends plays an essential role in our own navigation through life. We draw inspiration from them. We seek guidance from them. They’re there when we need someone to lean on, to laugh with, to hug and share stories with.
Friends help give us direction and support and ultimately have a big say in who we are today.
This is a good thing right?
Well yeah of course – but it depends…
We all want to feel safe. And a part of something. A group. A squad. Or a tribe if you like. We want to belong. We want to feel comfortable.
However I don’t believe comfortable and successful go together in the same sentence.
Being safe and feeling a part of something just for the comfort it brings isn’t going to challenge you to be better.
It’s not going to help you achieve what you really want to achieve.
Although the positives of having a great group of friends FAR outweigh the negatives, I want to explore this ”law of attraction” theory a little further.
Remember we attract and feel comfortable around people that have the same views and beliefs as us. Positive or negative.
Late American entrepreneur and motivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said ”we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.”
When it’s put like this it begs the question – if the people we hang around with matter so much, could they be holding us back from achieving our goals and dreams? Are they subconsciously dragging us down to a level where progress is non-existent? Are we making the right decisions on who we associate with?
Think about it. Successful people surround themselves with other successful people. People who want to learn, surround themselves with smarter people than them so they can learn.
On the flip side people who want to get drunk and party every weekend will find a way to squeeze into a group that enjoys doing just that.
People who don’t value their own health and fitness evidently seek people with the same views and they feed off each other’s vibe. They seek proof in each other to justify what they believe and to reinforce that they’re ok. They’re not alone. They’re safe. And comfortable. Albeit unhealthy.
The rich feed the rich. The negative feed the negative. The healthy feed the healthy. The complainers feed the complainers. The confident feed the confident. The bold feed the bold. The loving feed the loving. The greedy feed the greedy. The fearful feed the fearful. The gossipers feed the gossipers. The happy feed the happy. The sad feed the sad…
Get my point?
In summing up take a look at who you are spending most of your time with and ask yourself if they are having a positive influence on where you are heading.
Do they challenge you to be better or do they hold you back in one way or another?
Monitor the dialogue next time you’re in a conversation with your friends or even your own internal dialogue to see where you’re at and what influences they are having on you.
We often sabotage our progress in life and never really fulfil our potential simply because we want to feel safe.
Maybe it’s time to challenge yourself and take the next step in succeeding at something that means a lot to you?
Maybe it’s time to start hanging around other people?
Unless you’re all good feeling safe and comfortable ?
The people around you matter!
See you in the gym 🙂