ADVICE TO MY YOUNGER SELF
So the other day I pulled aside my younger self, sat him down and gave him some advice on a few important things I’ve learnt over the years.
Here’s what was said…
What other people think about you is none of your business. External validation isn’t as important as you think it is. Besides, everyone is too busy caught up in their own self obsessed world to really care what you’re doing anyway. The story in your own head about you is all that matters. Make sure it’s a good one.
The more you expect from people, the more you’ll be left disappointed. Appreciate when you do have support but ultimately, relying on others creates too much vulnerability.
Stop trying to be a control freak. You have very little say over what life throws at you. If you leave life alone and stop trying to manipulate it, you’ll be pleasantly surprised at the outcome.
It’s not about how big it is, it’s what you do with it that counts. I’m talking about your brain by the way. Get your mind out of the gutter and on to the fact that YOU create your own reality. No one else.
Don’t take for granted putting your socks on without doing your back. Trust me it hurts.
Women will come and go. They go for a reason. Caring and giving too much isn’t a bad thing either by the way. You just need to recognise when you’re doing it for the wrong ones. These are costly lessons but oh so valuable blessings to move on with.
Watching innocent kids blissfully going about their day, playing, laughing and saying whatever they want without a filter is incredibly inspiring. Something that our adult self needs to take note of.
Keep your circle nice and small. Be who you are and say what you feel because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter.
There’s no such thing as perfect so don’t beat yourself up. It’s impossible to even define the word. It’s because it’s an illusion. Be kind and have compassion for yourself. Mistakes are the only way to learn and grow.
When you’re young you’ll love leaving home to go to parties. When you’re my age you’ll love leaving parties to go home.
There’s a difference between pleasure and happiness. And it’s f***ing huge. For so long I mistook pleasure for happiness and consistently got the two mixed up but the illusion has eventually revealed itself. What comes with this realisation is a lot of power and opportunity to create.
Smile at strangers. And do it more often. Even if they don’t smile back. You have no idea what they’re going through. It could make their day.
It’s not all about you so don’t take things too seriously. Try and wrap your head around this to give you more perspective… The sun is 1 million times the size of planet earth. It takes 225 million years for the sun to travel around our galaxy (the Milky Way). Now take into account there’s more than 100 billion galaxies other than the Milky Way in the universe. And these are just the ones that are observable. Crazy numbers. Numbers that we aren’t designed to comprehend. Feel small yet?
Nothing lasts forever. Good, bad or indifferent. It is the most purest concept of life. Once you get this, and I mean really get it, any stress, anxiety and fear will automatically diminish and it will give you the freedom to do whatever you want.
Always try to carry 15 shopping bags from your car or die trying before taking two trips. Life’s all about efficiency.
You can’t please everyone. This was and still is what I’m always trying to do when I have dealings with people. However, we all have a different perspective on things and are wired differently. Haters are gonna hate no matter how nice and accommodating you are.
You don’t always get what you want. This is actually a good thing because it will keep you super grounded and help you appreciate things a lot more. Plus, there’s hidden blessings missing out on things you want. Once you recognise these, they will make you seriously question why the hell you wanted them in the first place. People are generally unhappy until they get what they want – and then the cycle starts again. Go figure.
You know very little. But guess what, you’re no different to everyone else so it’s ok. Everyone is winging their life and ultimately no one has a clue about what they’re doing here. From the most powerful person on the planet to the most insignificant, we are all just making it up as we go. It’s really important to understand this and recognise there’s an opportunity to make what you want out of it. Be grateful for that.
Keep exercising for as long as you’re alive. Your health is the only thing you really have. It is your most valuable asset. Don’t neglect it – treat your body with respect and it will repay the favour when you need it the most.
Hindsight is a beautiful thing. You’ll also love to say that to people too as the years go by.
Making people laugh will be one of the most enjoyable experiences in your life.
So will jumping into bed with freshly washed bed sheets. It really is the simple things.
You’ll start losing hair in places where you want it and grow it in places where you don’t want it. Damn it.
But on the flip side – Nothing is ever good or bad. Unless you say it is.
‘’If you have a body, we can help you’’
Ben
Infinite Fitness Peninsula
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