I’ve been fortunate enough to do a bit of travelling of late. Greece, Russia, UK and Norway have been the destinations. So many amazing experiences and a hell of a lot of fun. Europe just does it for me in so many ways.
The only shit thing about it is its so bloody far away. In fact when you look at the world map, us Aussies are far away from everything! Just sitting over in the corner minding our own business and having our heads stuck up our butts.
Because we are so isolated we tend to get caught up with ourselves a lot coz there’s nothing else to do. Experiencing other parts of the world and their rich history and culture isn’t as easy as clicking your fingers.
On the other hand over in Europe they do day trips to other countries. Wtf is that? Here we do day trips to Sorrento (insert eye roll)
They can catch a train to experience a totally different country, it’s culture and one that speaks an entirely different language. Here we take a plane ride for 4-5 hours and we’d still be in the same place greeted by a lady named Sheryl wanting to know how many snags she should chuck on the barbie. Fair dinkum mate…
But no matter where or how far you travel for your holiday (and I’m sure I’m not alone when I say this) I reckon the most hated part of going away is actually the trip back home.
When you leave there’s a high level of excitement and anticipation about what the experience may bring and so many things to look forward to.
But coming home and ‘back to reality’ is tough. Especially when there’s a 20-odd hour plane ride ahead of you.
To say it’s a challenge is an understatement. My goodness talk about mental toughness. That shit could break even the most resilient of minds and turn people loco.
Crammed up like sardines in a can dealing with crying babies, no room to stretch your legs, people coughing and sneezing all over each other, sitting next to people that hog the arm rest and a guy snoring in your ear. Yuk.
This is economy class in all it’s glory.
If there is one thing travelling long distance has taught me it’s patience. Travelling long distance in economy however has taught me what it feels like to be tortured.
So after a few cracks over the years of travelling in the cheap seats, last year I decided to erase the scars and saddle up in business class. I couldn’t bare the thought of coming home after my holiday stuck in an uncomfortable seat with next to no sleep for 20 hours so I thought why not.
Fair to say there’s a good chance I’m never going back either.
I remember the stopover in Dubai before heading back to Melbourne…
After having a few hours of relaxation in the business lounge I made my way to the gate and was confronted by hundreds and hundreds of people waiting to board. All probably coming home from holidays.
The look of sadness and despair was evident. It was eerily quiet too considering how many people there were in such a small space. Dunno if it was the realisation their holidays were over or the thought of the most testing 13 hour leg in economy was still ahead of them.
Anyway when that sweet tone of the ladies voice came over the speaker saying ‘all business class and first class passengers please make your way to the boarding gate’ I was like a kid in a candy store. Fuck yeah don’t have to line up!
The only challenge was to make my way through this mass of people ready to board saying excuse me, excuse me and met with evil eyes of jealously. Like people were seriously giving me the eye haha couldn’t believe it.
They’d probably been waiting there for ages and all of a sudden this schmuck rocks up and goes straight to the head of the queue.
To be fair though it was arguably one of the most satisfying moments I had on the whole trip haha. Felt like a king.
Stay back peasants! Didn’t you hear this is for business class and first class passengers only. Kindly make some room for the important people.
Don’t worry I know what it’s like to be in your position. It’s tough. I get it. You can do it though. Stay strong and I’ll see you in Melbourne. Or maybe not because I’ll already be with my chauffeur before you’ve even left the plane.
Ps. Could you just move your bag out of the way so I can get through. Not sure if you heard but it was first class and business class passengers only… lol
I do want to point out that obviously you pay a higher premium for this level of service and the privileges that come with it. Everything from the members lounge with all you can eat buffets, private shower facilities, massages and couches to kick back on, priority boarding and disembarking, fine dining and my own chauffeur to pick me up once I’ve landed.
The main reason for me though is so I can fly in peace. My own seat that turns into a bed, my own waiter, pretty much my own toilet, and no one to think about let alone look at. And we all probably know by now how much I like my own space – with business there’s plenty of it.
When I think about it I’d like to think IFP has an element of business class to it actually. Even first class if you want to go that far. In fact it’s what we strive for. You pay for what you get and to be honest even then I think it’s unders in my humble opinion.
We want to stand out because what we can provide is better than the run of the mill gym out there. Far better.
Our care factor is higher, our level of experience is higher, our standards are higher, our attention to detail is greater and our service is better. Our facilities are cleaner. Our equipment is always maintained and our staff go over and above for our members.
However there is a big challenge in all of this and that’s getting people to understand the differences between us and our competitors.
I get it. We’re all trying to get ahead and get that business class ticket for an economy price. No one wants to feel ripped off either and are wary of spending their hard earned on something they aren’t sure they’ll get a return on.
We’re all careful about how we spend our cash as it’s obviously an important commodity to have.
But I will say – that’s all good and well when you are talking about material things. If you can get a good deal when you ‘shop’ it’s always a win as you feel like you’ve cheated the system and feel proud believing you’ve had exclusive access to something that others don’t or are paying more for.
My only concern is you need to be very careful about putting your health and well-being in the same category as buying a nice pair of Jeans for half price online.
I’ll put it this way when it comes to gyms – you want something cheap you’ll get cheap in return.
When it comes to seeking professional help in the gym, there’s first class highly reputable airlines and then there’s budget airway companies (to use an analogy)
There’s a massive difference in everything you get but to the ignorant general population this often gets missed.
To be frank it still amazes me how many people come in and ask – so can I have a discount? Can you do a better rate? If 2 of us sign up can we get it cheaper?
Do you actually know what you’re really saying?
Two things… One – you’re being a cheap arse on yourself. That shows a lack of respect firstly and says a lot about how you feel about you.
Secondly – as I stated earlier we pride ourselves on giving our members as higher class service as possible. We value our time as well as yours and because of this we don’t degrade ourselves on price when others do.
You pay for what you get and for what we provide for our members I think the value is exceptional.
At the end of the day we’d all like to live a business class life on an economy budget. The big difference here is we are talking about your health and well-being. Probably not something you should try and cut corners on in my opinion.
Still it’s very common for gym, personal training and anything health and fitness related to be one of the first things to go from peoples budgets when ‘things get tight’.
Of course you need to do your due diligence when you’re about to spend money but remember it’s an investment in you and your life. Invest wisely.
Having said that, me paying more money for my business class ticket and having the service and luxuries that I wanted was well worth it.
‘’If you have a body, we can help you’’
Infinite Fitness Peninsula