For all the control freaks (just like me)…
We’re all very admirable in search of chasing our goals and dreams. Whatever they may be.
We are diligent, we persevere, and we become relentless.
Once we’ve honed in on what it is we want it can become an obsession. We cling to it. This helps direct our actions and attention towards it.
We pride ourselves on choosing our mark, aiming and expecting to hit dead centre. We place a lot of pressure on ourselves to be right and not make mistakes.
Over time we learn and become competent in planning, strategising and creating an image of what things will look and feel like. We fantasise and we explore all of the amazing endless possibilities attached to our goals.
However, no matter how much time, effort, positivity, planning and preparing we put into our pursuits, we are always at the mercy of the uncontrollable.
There is always an uncontrollable element that surrounds anything we go after. Or anything we already have for that matter.
What we sometimes have to learn the hard way is we can’t control everything. Even if you’ve done everything within your capabilities.
For some, this can be deeply unsettling. It creates anxiety, frustration, uncertainty and fear.
It’s because we yearn to be in control. Our ego feeds off this desire to have to know everything. It’s our survival mechanism.
We do this to feel safe. To feel secure. To be ok. And keep our identity in tact.
Our mind is always looking to conceptualise and interpret anything it can get it’s hands on. It has to come up with a reason or a conclusion as to what, why and how.
We think that once we’ve found the answer, we have regained control. We have our power back. We’re all good now. We have satisfied our desire to know.
However this can be the mind playing tricks on us.
The real power is being at peace with not knowing. To be able to handle the uncontrollable takes a lot of mindfulness and internal wrestling. Something that can require an enormous amount of energy.
Even though negative emotions attached to this come to a head at this time, it can be an extremely freeing experience to let go.
Remember there is always one thing you can choose here.
When you feel like all your plans and aspirations are being challenged and the indestructible platform you have built surrounding your dreams and goals becomes shaky through uncontrollables, you always have the choice to decide how you respond.
You choose what happens with any challenge you’re facing simply by acknowledging the uncontrollable nature of anything and everything you come across.
Act as if you know that life only throws at you what you are capable of handling. Nothing more.
If someone told you this was the absolute truth then you needn’t worry about what’s going to happen. With any situation. You will find peace in letting go and trusting that you will survive.
Dealing with uncertainty and loss can be very confronting. However it is absolutely necessary for us to grow and learn.
To let go means to free yourself from the negative emotions we feel when our plans, dreams and aspirations are being challenged.
This doesn’t mean we lose focus and give up on the things that mean everything to us.
Whenever we are challenged by things that are out of our control, instead of resisting we need to embrace, accept and learn from them.
Ironically, giving up control can give us the ability to get what we’re after as we now free ourselves to pursue without limitations.
There’s so many more layers to this but for now I hope it’s sparked something in you.
‘’If you have a body, we can help you’’
Ben
Infinite Fitness Peninsula
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